175: The Reasons For Your Indecision
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Everyone experiences indecisiveness in their lives. Most of us have different levels of indecisiveness. Maybe you can’t decide on what shirt to wear, what food to eat, what phone to buy, or any number of different things. What causes indecisiveness?
Let’s first look at the different types of personalities. Of the four personality types (Lion, Monkey, Owl, and Koala), 2 of them standout the most with indecisiveness; Owls and Koalas. Owls and Koalas have very different reasons though. Owls tend to refrain from making quick decisions because they have a desire to have all the information beforehand. Koalas tend to hold off to make sure they are not upsetting or inconveniencing someone else.
Owls will take something that many of us consider trivial and over analyze it. Is it the right price, does someone else have it cheaper, Is there a similar product that will do the same job, but also provide more or cost less? Koalas will usually wait for others to make the decision. At group gatherings, or outings, they often hold back from suggesting what to do so that they don’t exclude one person or another. Will they want to do this, does everyone like do go here, what time works best for everyone, will everyone find value in my suggestion?
None of the above is necessarily a bad thing. However, it is important to understand why we hesitate or why we have a hard time making decisions. A negative indecision comes from a sense of permanence. We delay deciding because we can’t see the results today. In those times we often feel that because we don’t see an immediate result, we need more information before making the final decision.
The importance for us is in recognizing when we are letting indecisiveness prevent us from moving forward with our improvement. Kyle gives a great example of a man wanting to talk to a woman he likes. The man goes through several internal questions before mustering up the courage to talk to her. Or he doesn’t. I went through something similar. I asked myself all the self-doubting questions that started building up my wall of excuses and ultimately led to me not talking to a woman I was interested in. Yes. If I had just gone to talk to her, I might have been shut down, or viewed as weird. True, I could risk upsetting that person, but I never took the risk and therefore, never had a chance.
There is a great statement that works in this situation. “If you don’t make a decision, you might not like the decision that is made for you.” Look at the decision before you. When you notice yourself building walls, ask yourself why you are building up defenses. Force yourself to make the decision. Start small, and you will find that deciding can be more fulfilling than waiting for others to make decisions for you.
